random stuff

Its official. With the exeption of a few, i can no longer fit into my old t-shirts. They either are too short and show off my extremely white lower belly or are too tight at the armpit area and rub against me. So i went shopping here in town for some outfits.

Had another weird dream last night. I think Hayden must have been kicking really hard. In my dream, I was looking down at my stomach. The baby was moving slowly. Then, with what looked like Sonic the Hedgehog motions, the baby started moving like crazy. It looked like he was trying to claw his way out of me. For some reason i wasnt scared, i was just saying "look! I can see his little hands!! Look!" I was extremely excited. Now im thinking that it was more creepy.

Freaked out

Yesterday afternoon i noticed that i hadnt been feeling many kicks from the baby. It was more like a soft grazing feeling with barely any good kicks mixed in. It was like that until 3:00 today. I was really starting to get scared because normally i receive nothing but quick hard jabs throughout the day. Thankfully, mom calmed m e down. I ate a orange, apple and a slice of the banana bread (not all at once... separated by 15 minutes or so...), and sure enough as i reclined back into the sofa *BUMP*. He started to kick like normal again! Needless to say that made my day- i guess i was freaking out over nothing, but i couldnt help it.

Banana bread and Scarlet Ohara

Ive only seen Gone With the Wind once when gema took us all to a really fancy theatre to see it when it first came out. So, today i rented it and wow. I guess i wasn't paying attention when i first saw it and didn't follow the story at all, but today i totally see why it won so many awards. I'm definitely glad that the DVD came with subtitles because half of the time i didn't catch all the dialogue. Anyways, after sitting for four hours watching spoiled Miss Scarlet weasle her way through life, i saw a butter commercial that featured hot banana bread. Drool. I couldnt stop thinking about oven fresh banana bread. So, i pulled out the ripened bananas that Jerry bought and never ate out of the refridgerator and made some. Mmmmm. It hit the spot.

Things that make me feel girly:

• The feeling of a skirt hitting freshly shaved leggs
• Freshley painted nails
• hearing 'wow' when jerry sees me dressed up w/ my hair done nicely (i dont dress up often)
• having a really good hairday- silky hair that you smell each time it moves
• wearing a silky shirt without worrying about having sweat stains on the armpits (idk why silky shirts always make me sweat...)
• making a really pretty dessert that impresses everyone else

Bathroom reader

Okay, its not the best thing to post about, but i really like this book i bought for the bathroom. Its called "Oops! or, life's awful moments" by Art Linkletter. Its nothing but funny stories that Linkletter heard on his TV and radio shows. I got it for ten cents at a garage sale and what a buy! I used to love reading(not always in the bathroom... theyre fun to read on the sofa too..) the Super Dooper Bathroom Reader books that jesse would get for Christmas each year, and now im glad i found a substitute for those. Im currently on the chapter about what children had revealed about their parents habits.

!!

Theres a lot of garage sales tomorrow in town!! Plus beki's coming down and we're going to eat at super taco. yummy. My saturday is going to be full of fun

Fears

Im scared of not having that connection with my baby. I saw a girl from school today with her two yr old. She seemed to just lug him around like an old sweater not really caring what he was doing or wanted. I dont want that to be me. Im scared that when he comes, it wont come to me naturally. Is that normal?

On the other hand, i am excited to be able to control what happens to him. I wont need to have to uncomfortably ask to hold him, feed him, or change him. Ill be with him 24/7 and responsible for his needs and wants. Its a scary thought, but im excited.

Oops

I think i accidentally threw away a charger chord to jerrys bluetooth(its not bluetooth brand its something similar to it) He never used it and it was just in the storage closet and when i saw it i thought it was to an old cell phone. Now hes searching all over for it to sell to his friend... oops. He NEVER used it more than once- i thought it was just a piece of junk taking up space. Im innocently sitting here acting like i have no idea where it is while hes searching under the couch cushions... 8-)

Revenge

A while back ago, jerry had this stupid lionfish in the tank with all the rest of the fish. Everyday i would tell him how the lionfish was eyeing the smaller clownfish. Jerry would say "Nah, he wont do anything. It wont even fit in its mouth". Sure enough, one day i got home, looked at the tank and there was no clownfish!! The lionfish had a huge bulge in his mouth (they can hold a lot of food and slowly digest it) and when it opened its mouth i could see that there was clearly a orange colored object in there. Jerry laughed it off but i was so angry! That clownfish was cute and I had told him a milliontimes that it was looking at my fish with hungry eyes. Anyways, Jerry has this large green carpet anenome that he thought was pretty docile. The other clownfish claimed it as home and it made the tank extra colorful. Apparently, one of the cleaner shrimp thought it was safe enough to hop on and start cleaning it. Wrong. Later we couldnt figure out what happened to the other shirmp (theres two). I had seen a long white strand coming out of the anenomes mouth/opening but i didnt say anything because Jerry really loves those dumb shrimp. However, as time passed by, there were bubbles released from its mouth and out comes the skin of the shrimp. I couldnt help but laugh- it was just so comical looking (especially after looking at jerrys horrified face). Now, of course, hes taking it back to the pet store.

Wow

I was looking for some birthing videos online and ran across this link. Its by NOVA and is really awesome. Theres different chapters covering different things. Its really educational and explained a lot of things that i was wondering about. The graphics are great.

http://stream.qtv.apple.com/channels/wgbh/refs/111901/nova2816_08_ref.mov


I had my diabetes test today. It wasnt as bad as i thought it was going to be. The drink wasnt HORRIBLE. It just burned my throat going down. My appt was at 11:15. I didnt go into a room until 1:00. Almost two hours in the waiting room. I bought a book with me (I know Why The Caged Bird Sings) and got about halfway through it. Then after drinking the liquid, i read for another hour until they took my blood. It was fun. Needless to say, I was starving by the time i got out.

Stupid Game

Update:

I hate monopoly

Monopoly Craze

It seems like forever since i have played monopoly. I used to HATE the game. Adam always ended up with tons of money and houses and the game just went on and on and on. But yesterday walmart was having a sale on the original game ( i was also looking at the new credit card edition- wow) and Jerry had never played it before, so i bought it. It turned out to be a lot of fun. We had mushroom steak hoagies and played until 12 at night. Jerry won hands down (stupid boardwalk rent was $600 and I only had $574... oh the shame) but i actually enjoyed it.

I ended up missing this months doctors appointment. The secretary had written "02/01" then put a big X through it and wrote "2/15". So When i showed up on the 15th, she was like ":S I didnt know you had an appointment. You had one on the first but didnt show up". I busted out my card and showed her how she had clearly marked it out. She squeezed me in on monday at 11- which means im going to be waiting until 4 for the doctor to finish everything. Oh well. Theyre going to be doing the diabetes test. Yum.

Jerry's challenging me to to another game of monopoly. Wish me luck!

Cute

We're sitting sharing a banana split and Jerrys talking to hayden. Each time he asks a question he put his hand on my stomach and, sure enough, the baby kicks in response. Jerry grins with delight and continues talking. Its super cute.

Yay!

Hes moving out begining of April!!

Jerry's Mom

Jerry got a call from his brother this morning. His mom is extrememly sick. Somethings wrong with her heart but the doctors wheres shes at (mexico city) will not work on her or further investigate her condition because of the lack of money she has- so basically they left her to get worse. Jerrys really upset. With the baby coming we're not able to send large amounts of money like we did before when they got sick (it happens a lot-mexico city is one of the most polluted cities in the world) and this is really upsetting to him. Theyre not 100% sure (because the doctors arent helping her) that its her heart. Hopefully its something else. Please pray for her. We're sending money for her to get some pills the doctors recomended-lets hope that it helps her. Im thinking that it might be pneomonia. She was complaining about having the flu- being tired and coughing a lot with a slight fever. I don't know. I just hope she gets better. Shes so sweet- always starts crying (in a good way) when we talk to her about how the babys growing and starting to kick- and offers plenty of advice on what i should eat or not eat. Shes always been so happy that jerry and i are together. Im sad that i havent been able to meet her , especially now that shes gotten so sick.

Alone in the dark

-Where is everyone? It seems like jenny and I are the only ones posting anymore. (8) all by myselff... dont wanna be (8)

-Lately ive been having nightmares about people poking my belly. I think it started with the Ikea incident where the buggy banged me in the stomach(it really scared me) and grew worse when Lisa startled me by quickly shooting her hand out to touch my stomach. The nightmares are mostly about a scary looking person yelling at me then jabbing me in the stomach with their finger. It sounds weird but I jolt awake and can actually feel where in my dream someone had poked me.

Tired

I am so ready for jerrys brother to GET OUT. I am tired of having to deal with someone that i cant gripe at. I have a list going on what i need to do before the baby arrives and the first thing i tackled was the kitchen. I cleaned it top to bottom, got new drip pans, scrubbed out the cabinets. Everything that i could think of. All this week jerrys brother has decided to cook for himself (he normally eats at his gf's place). The first day he cooked i wasnt here. I come back from eating with my parents and the brand new drip pans i bought were completely ruined. It was just one but I cant just buy ONE drip pan from walmart. He had oil in a pan that was really hot and it splattered or something and now theres hideous brownish-yellow burnt liquid on them and I cant get it off! Of course, i went cheap on the pans in the first place so when i was scrubbing them after an hour long soaking, it started turning a dark grey! GRR! My oven has three pretty drip pans and one disgusting one. Then monday afternoon, i scrubbed down the wall, sweeped and mopped. Later that night he cooked again. I walk in and the floor has muddy water all over it and theres pieces of cucumber stuck to the freshly scrubbed wall where he had peeled it. And today I was putting away the clean dishes and the cabinets that i had JUST reorganized and made look pretty were all screwed up. The pots and pans were hazardously piled ontop of eachother instead of nicely separated according to size and shape. Ugh! Each time i have to walk around the crib/dresser/piles of baby stuff in the living room i get so angry! How can he have the odasity to want to stay until may?! MAY!! When im due MAY 18th!! I feel like im living in a box! The living room is so crowded! Im upset because I know i wont be able to help out getting the room ready like i wanted when he moves out. I really want to be able to put it all together. I cant really explain it. *sigh*

Crafts

Ive been trying to think of something to put on the walls of th ebaby room that wouldnt tick off the managers and would be easy to match with other colors. So i decided to try to rip off some neat images i found online. I was thinking that maybe if i used the scrapbook glue that can be adjusted like a million times after its already been stuck, that I could use this to put the images on the wall (its washable and plus if it stains the wall, i can just repaint that spot.. idk i could use double sided tape. ) I wanted it to look like a sticker on the wall.Anywho, so i finally did it today! Heres the pics. Im not so sure about the elephant. It didnt come out looking like the graphics. The elephant head looks mishapen but its not- i quickly used some tacks to put it on the wall to show what it would look like. I like the mouse and tree though..

This is when i was cutting out the images. Later i painted them both black and added a cute tree.

The head lis all weird on the elephant but its normally just the rounded egg shape. I just wanted to see how it would look on the wall. Im painting the wall a pretty green and wanted to put these (not so close) up.

Im not that happy with the elephant. Somethings wrong with it.

This is th eimage I copied: I didnt want it to have the flowers to reduce the girlyness of it all.
I like how this image is nice and chubby but the board i was using wasnt fat enough for it to look like that. *tear*

Vomit Friend

I always had friends in school but never any that i really trusted with important issues. In school you could tell by what table you sat at who you were friends with. My problem in school was that my "friends" were more interested in being part of something big than keeping secrets or issues private. If i were to tell a friend something that was to be private, the next day not only would the entire table know about it, but the surrounding tables would know it too. I thought it would always be like that- I never knew it to be different. I learned to stay quiet with what i felt, who i had crushes on, what i thought of other people. Sure enough, even with this, i was still taunted by highschool rumors about what my "friends" were saying when i wasnt around. I learned to live with it.

It wasnt until i began working at Brothers Bakery that i found someone who i could completely trust with everything. Lisa scared the crap out of me the first couple of months i worked there. She seemed so... intense. She was silent but always had a quick comeback when someone insulted/teased her, full of knowledge, and seemed to have so much self control and wisdom for someone who was only one year my senior. I remember the first day i worked there, she had come up to see what i was like. I was 18 at the time...
"How old are you now?"
*quiet scared voice*"19.."
"really? Thats how old i am."
"oh my gosh, im only 18, I just heard that you were 19 earlier and had that in my mind.."
"okay.." Then she walked away. Later i heard her talking to matt, the baker:
"Matt, she doesnt even know how old she is!" (needless to say, my entire face turned red with embarrassment as i heard this..)

it sucked.

But slowly the weeks went by we started talking more and more. She was so much like me i was shocked. Soon we were getting yelled at by Ryan for being too loud in the back, teaching eachother stupid dance moves at 5 in the morning, and getting into dough/cake(anything that was on hand) wars. I actually trusted her with personal stuff. From arguments with jerry, complaints about friends, and just information that i was never comfortable talking about with anyone else. She helped a lot when I went to stay with gema for a while and I like to think that I helped when she broke up with her long-time boyfriend temporarily.

Recently something happened that made me realize how happy i am to be friends with her. Shes my true vomit friend- someone who i can spew out all the information thats bearing down on me. I know that she will always be friends with me and we'll always be in touch. for that im extremely greatful.

The last time we actually hung out was at the 70's mystery party we threw at the bakery. Shortly after this, I ended up leaving. Since then, i swing by a lot to catch up and get the free pastry.

She's coming to the baby shower and i hope you all will be able to meet her!

*note- this post sounds like shes my only real friend and thats certainly not true. Shes just my only real friend that i trust thats not also related to me. :P

Thinking

We've been thinking of names for the baby. I was dead set on Megan Rebekah if it was a girl and I put off th eboys name because i was sure that it would be female. So, we have been thinking and we like Michael and Hayden. We both like Hayden a lot. In spanish its more like High-dun which doesnt sound too shabby either (its better than miguel... gag). I picked out the first name and jerry was in charge of the middle. He apparently has always loved the name Obed since he was a kid. He says its from the Bible, I looked it up online. I told him that it sounded too foreign but he really wants it. So it'll be Hayden Obed.

Yesterday Jerry bought home two bags full of babys clothing with a note that said "for baby Hayden". It was from jerry's friends wife. I cleaned out the kitchen counters and gave the same lady a bag full of food and drinks that we would never use so she turned around and cleaned out her sons room for me. Nice, huh? I threw away some shirts and bibs that were stained or didnt look like they had much life left in them. There were A LOT of things that i kept- lots of little shoes, socks, onesies, and overalls.

Internet

Yay, I finally got internet put in the apartment. Its the cable internent and seems to be really good so far. Its not slow or anything. Im super happy with it. I can finally keep up with my blogging now. Woohoo.

Ikea

I love Ikea. I hate all the stupid losers who stop in the middle of the crowded isle to stare at something in the showcase. Jerry and I went to Ikea over the weekend to get some things to decorate the apartment. I was walking with my cart when these group of hispanic girls just stop right in front of me. So the cart i was pushing ended up hitting me in the stomach. It wasnt HARD it just made me SO mad. I was already fustrated because people are so dumb in Ikea so i started tearing up. Then i did the only thing that would make me feel good at the time: trash talked them in spanish until they moved out of my way. haha. It allowed me to release my anger and i left with a sense of satisfaction as the girls all moved into the bedroom (with nervous looks in my direction) instead of in the walking strip.

After that, i should say that the shopping was a lot more enjoyable. We left with a full cart.