:(

Tomorrows the last saturday ill be with hayden before my sat classes start. *tear*

Poor guy

For those of you who havent been able to see hayden yet, you should know that hes quite the talker. He makes sounds all the time- sleeping, eating,or when hes just staring. At first i thought it was really cute but recently its been causing him problems. I think he falls asleep and forgets that hes making noise. He'll be asleep for a while without making his noises then he'll make his noise and his eyes will shoot open and he'll make a little shreak/cry then look around as though trying to find the person who dared to make a sound so loud that it scared him out of his sleep. He'll go back to sleep soon after but these little burst are happeningmore often and im kind of worried. He doesnt seem to be in pain so i really think its just him scaring himself.

smiles

Hayden dreaming of nice, warm bottles.

Notice his crazy afro hair-i washed it and couldnt get it under control.

Crazy

Last night I went to bed early while jerry was left watching hayden. I fell asleep really fast and didnt wake up when he laid down. It still feels weird to go from having a big stomach to a smaller one and so lately ive been sleeping with a pillow rolled up next to my stomach. About thirty minutes after jerry fell asleep, I started to dream that he was going to give hayden to me to hold while he made a bottle. I held out my hands and felt a soft blob fall into my arms. The only problem was that I couldnt find haydens head. I started screaming "wait wait, i cant get his head. Wheres his head!? Turn on the lights!" I felt wildly for a head but felt nothing but a soft body that felt like it was drowning in blankets. I continued fumbling crazily looking for a baby's head when i heard jerry far off in the distance "amber, what are you looking for? Are you okay? Haydens asleep in his basket..." Suddenly i was awake and staring at the pillow that had gone from soothing me tothe cause of my complete horror. My hands were actually inside the pillowcase still looking for the babys head.

Hayden's here

Heres Hayden!

Its taken me a while to get online and post! I cant believe that tomorrow Hayden will be a week old. It went by so fast! The time spent at the hospital was probably the hardest of all of it. The labor process went by so fast! I had an epidural very early and just passed the time talking and listening to everyone talk. While delivering hayden, I tore a lot and lost a lot of blood. Because of this, i was not able to get out of bed for two days (i nearly passed out just trying to sit up in bed) and hayden was bottle fed as I was not able to. It was really hard on jerry. He hardly slept and had to deal with all the diaper changes and late night bottle feedings by himself. He did a great job though.
We left sunday morning. It was soo good to get back to the apartment. Haydens been great. He sleeps for 3-4 hours, gets a bottle (i havent been able to successfully breast feed him.He just gets so angry and upset each time I try) and fresh diaper, then goes back to sleep within 30 minutes. I have to say that he is eating A LOT. At the hospital it started at 1- 2 ounces, then was uped to 2-3, now five days later hes eating 3-4 ounces every feeding. Hes a porker thats for sure.
I still get a little dizzy every once in a while but it goes as quick as it comes.
I cant get enough of him! I love just having him asleep on my chest watching all his little facial expressions. Im realizing now that the cutest ones of all are also the ones that mean that hes about to leave a present for me to clean, but I dont mind. Haha. So far his schedule has been great. He wakes up at 10, 1:30, 4ish, then 7. Hes so snuggly.
Its great being a mom. Ihave to admit that it still doesnt feel real. It seems like the whole nine months just flew by.

Jerrys doing a lot better with the handling of Hayden. At first he was really nervous about holding him. He's still nervous but not near as bad.

New Plan

The doctor just called and said that he had to schedule me to go in on friday instead of thursday. Im guessing that the three maternity rooms that the hospital have are full and they wont have room for me tomorrow morning. Way to crush the excitement. I guess its for the better. We're having really bad weather lately- Gema said shes working red cross in granite shoals and we're on tornado watch until late tonight. Hopefully the bad weather will pass by so everyone isnt driving in bad weather friday.

Planned birth

I had my doctors appointment today and the doc and I decided that this thursday ill be induced at the Llano Memorial Hospital. Im supposed to be there at 5:30 in the morning to get my first dose of pitocin. Its really kind of weird knowing when im going to be in labor. The whole mystery of when the contractions will start etc has now vanished and has been replaced with nervousness and excitement that on thursday night ill most likely be lying with my baby. Then again, it is kind of nice being able to call everyone before hand and give them a good two days notice instead of a frantic call two hours into contractions. At least i can clean the house knowing that im not cleaning something that will just get dirty again before he comes. Woo im really nervous now that im thinking about it. Im getting jittery- haha. My doctors not going to be working next week because his family is going out of town. Im due this sunday and I dont think i would have been able to wait until the week of the 26th to start the labor process naturally. Surely with the way things have been feeling i would have gone into labor early next week at the latest and I didnt want to have some random doctor who i had never seen before delivering my baby. The doctor said i was 2 1/2 cm dilated and i had a "favorable cervix" (whatever that means) and with that in mind he thought inducing would be a good idea if i was worried about having a strange doctor soo it was decided. Im planning on having Jerry, mom and gema in the room with me. I dont think ill be that shy/modest about it because ill probably be thinking about pushing etc. Just no photos below the bellybutton guys... haha. Oh- the doctor confirmed my suspicions that inducing does hurt a lot more than going into labor naturally- so the whole idea of waiting until 7cm to get iv pain medications was thrown out the window and replaced with an epidural. Ill bring phase ten (thank you beki) and be just fine laying in bed almost pain free playing with whoever will join me.

I cant wait to actually see Hayden for the first time. It almost doesnt seem real that he'll be a real baby instead of a blurred face on a sonogram. Im so excited/anxious. Jerrys being really funny about it. When i told him that it would be this thursday he got this shocked look on his face and just started rambling about what he was going to do when he got home to get the house ready for haydens arrival. Then he started saying that his stomach hurt because he was so excited. Poor guy. I wouldnt be surprised if he ends up fainting on the hospital floor. lol just kidding.

Right well, im going to go wash dishes and clean up a little so i wont have to do much tomorrow. Just two days!